Blog | Compassionate Care Counseling Services

I hear you.

Posted By Elana Klemm, MA, LPC, NCC 03-26-2020

During these unprecedented times, fear, anxiety, isolation, and depressive episodes are prevalent within mental health. These are now pressing matters within an entire globe of humans, ourselves included. In a globalized state of uncertainty, how can we help? How can we make these uncertain times more settling? I know that this question has been circulating my thought process and understanding of the challenges being faced, and for some of my patients, situations such as isolated quarantine could heighten their symptoms to a crippling state.

I hear you.

I hear my patients’ concerns and thoughts.

I hear my colleagues’ who are searching for solutions

I can’t say I have the answers, but I can tell you the practices and reflections that I know are helpful during these hard times. Just like we approach all thought processes, we must observe the situation and realize what is entirely out of our control AND acknowledge that we are indeed in control of how we respond.

We all have the power to refocus and reboot!

Even in times of uncertainty, it presents us opportunity! Now it is a wonderful time to practice being in the moment. Hours could come and go if we focus too much on the news and constant updates. We all have been presented an opportunity to put our phones away, log off our computers, and hide the TV remote, and, indeed, be present. Whether they are members that live in your households, your pets, yourself, allow yourself to be completely in the moment.

The ever-changing news of Covid-19 and the media surrounding the situation can be a constant buzz, if you let it. Now is a good time to limit our screen time and decipher what is essential news and what news is that is just reporting on Covid-19 because it’s a hot topic. Important news would be information that is provided by trusted professionals in the field, direct information from government officials, and updates from the World Health Organization. To ease our minds from the constant ring of media, allow yourself to designate times to check the news and times to walk away from it all completely. We must remember that the information being released is ongoing and consistent. Find truth and block the noise.

Yes, we are stuck in our homes, but we get the opportunity to be with our families and slow down. Instead of letting negative energy consume our thoughts, we have been granted the spaces to practice making a mindset shift!

Businesses are closing their doors, but you have what we need and when you don’t, in due diligence, you can go shopping for those items.

Social distancing feels like isolation, but it makes contacting the people we love most more often and more creatively!

There is a lot of uncertainty right now, but you know what is in your control and what is out of your control. You have the power to make this situation amazing.

If we change our mindset to be positive, then opportunities for growth are endless. There are two kinds of anxiety: productive anxiety and unproductive anxiety. We can turn our anxiety into something productive. Moments like this also bring greif. That’s right, greif. Greif requires us to feel a kind of sadness that makes many of us so uncomfortable that we try to get rid of it. As much as there is collective anxiety surrounding Covid-19, but there’s also collective loss. Cognitive approaches for mindfulness will be vital in finding a balance in your life. You’ve been given an opportunity to focus on activities that you love, regardless of the things you may be losing.

Take a moment to stop and think about the passions in your life you may have neglected due to busy schedules. These are the tasks that you wish you could invest more time in and feel accomplished when you do pursue these passions wholeheartedly! Remember that book you wanted to dive into? Do you have a jigsaw puzzle laying around the house? Maybe this spring is the spring you start your garden back up? Fueling your joys can lead to positive emotions that keep the anxiousness away. Allow yourself to pour energy into yourself and hobbies, without the stress/obligations you may have otherwise had.

I also am a big encourager of trying a practice that is way outside your comfort zone. These are practices that you may have tried in the past or just figured it “wouldn’t be your thing.” It turns out, with more free time, you can try something new, and that is focused solely on bettering yourself! Even if they sound silly, or maybe uncomfortable at first, there is no harm in trying something new. If you open your mind and embrace the challenge, you might find a new practice that enhances your headspace. Here are some fun ideas to consider:

In recent years, adult coloring books, paint by numbers, or even diamond by numbers have grown in popularity! They stimulate creativity and focus, but can be relaxing and meditative. Don’t have access to a bookstore? Apps like Colorfy allow you to be artistic on any device.
Jogging/walking. Physical activity is allowed and encouraged during these times. Start with a lap around the block and increase each day.
Meditation is a great practice for slowing down racing thoughts and being present. If you are new to meditation, apps such as Calm and Headspace, can guide you through the process.

What’s great about being home and trying something new is that you are in a low stakes situation. You have control over the energy and effort. If you do try something new, give it a change and allow yourself to feel a little uncomfortable outside of your comfort zone. It’s ok if it doesn’t go to plan or you draw something messy. You are simply trying to better yourself and that is admirable!

As great as these practices can work for an at-home activity, remember that mental health professionals are still available for our patients. We have not left you and can accommodate. Virtual meeting programs can be scheduled for your convenience. To anyone that has paused their sessions or hasn’t yet scheduled an initial appointment, this might be the perfect time to move forward in your mental health journey.

For my colleagues, this is the time to be encouraging more and more patients to connect with you, even if it is not in person. It has been our duty to protect and serve those struggling with their mental health, and COVID-19 cannot take that spirit to save others away from us.

This is a great time to adapt, promote, and destigmatize the taboo around mental health because we know that globalized fear and uncertainty are affecting more than just our patients. Together we can make a push to encourage those in need to seek mental health professionals through social media, advertisements, and newsletters.

In times like these, we are reminded of the things that we have taken for granted: the people in our lives we love, our careers, going grocery shopping after work, and so forth. We can stand together and find creative solutions to the responses that are in our control. The pandemic canceling my father’s 90th birthday party, after months of organizing and planning? Out of my control. But my family members all attending our virtual, online video conference to celebrate made me realize that this pandemic cannot take away our ability to love and lean on those who make us feel safe and secure. Never could we have thought that a moment like this would encourage us all to reevaluate our priorities, be mindful of what matters most for the greater good, or lay rest our ability to be a provider of service that is needed more than ever. We all have moments of surprise, that catch us off guard and throw a wrench in plans, but a pandemic? We’ve all got this. We can do this together with love, kindness, and support from one another.

How to Co-Parent on Birthdays, Holidays & Other Special Occasions

Co-parenting can present obstacles at any time of the year, but it tends to be especially difficult on birthdays, holidays, and other special occasions. Here are a few tips for how to approach your next big event:

Decide on a schedule ahead of time. Chances are good that your co-parenting schedule will already be laid out in your custody agreement. If it’s not, make a point to discuss arrangements with your ex-partner well before the big day. Some co-parents alternate holidays—for example, mom gets Thanksgiving and dad gets Christmas one year, then they switch the following year—while others split those days in half. If you get along well with your ex-partner, you could even try spending the days together.
Be flexible. While it’s generally important to stick to your time-sharing schedule, being flexible every once in a while can go a long way toward building a friendly co-parenting relationship. If you were supposed to have your child all day on Easter but your ex-mother-in-law is throwing a big family party that morning, consider letting your child attend. Your ex-partner may extend you the same generosity on future occasions.
Communicate as much as possible. As long as it’s healthy and safe for you to do so, try to stay in touch and update your ex-partner on your plans so that you’re both on the same page. That way, you’ll avoid snafus like having both co-parents purchase the same birthday gift.

Take the First Step Toward a Healthy Co-Parenting Relationship

Do you and your ex-partner often struggle to co-parent the child or children that you share? Our therapists know how difficult co-parenting can be—especially on birthdays, holidays, and other special occasions—and we’ll draw on our many years of experience to provide you with helpful advice on how to approach this situation. Contact us today to schedule your first therapy session.

How to Support a Loved One Through a Panic Attack

Do you have a friend or family member who regularly experiences panic attacks? If so, you may be looking for ways to recognize when these attacks are taking place and offer your support. We’ve got the answers you need below.

How to Recognize a Panic Attack

Even if you’ve experienced panic attacks yourself, it can be difficult to tell when someone around you is having one. Your loved one may be experiencing a panic attack if:

They’re flushed, sweating, or otherwise appear to be hot (for example, they might have taken off an outer layer of clothing).
They’re shivering or shaking.
They’re hyperventilating or having trouble breathing.
They suddenly went quiet.

How to Help Someone During a Panic Attack

If you think that a friend or family member might be having a panic attack, it’s important to stay calm and treat them gently. You may want to:

Reassure them that they’re safe, the panic attack will be over soon, and you’ll stay with them in the meantime.
Guide them through breathing exercises.
Take them outside or open a window so they can get some fresh air.
Take them to a more private place.
Bring them a glass of water.

If your loved one frequently has panic attacks, you may want to ask them when they’re feeling calmer about how they’d like to be supported in the future.

Get Help With Your Loved One’s Panic Attacks

If you have a friend or family member who regularly experiences panic attacks, we encourage you to meet with one of the knowledgeable therapists at our practice. We have extensive experience treating panic attacks, and we can supply you with tools and tips for how to support your loved one. Contact us today to schedule a consultation.

Narcissism vs. Self-Confidence

Many people throw around the term “narcissist” very casually, using it to describe an individual with high self-esteem rather than one who actually has narcissistic personality disorder. Below, we explain what narcissism is and how it differs from self-confidence.

What Is Narcissism?

Narcissistic personality disorder is a mental health condition characterized by an excessive need to feel important and impress other people. Narcissistic individuals often:

Have an inflated sense of self-worth
Believe that they’re superior to others
Feel that they’re entitled to be treated in a special way
Fantasize about having success, power, beauty, and intelligence
Envy other people’s success
Exploit their friends and family members
Lack empathy
Act like snobs, treating others in a condescending manner

Interestingly, many people with narcissism internally doubt and criticize themselves, which can cause them to become preoccupied with being admired and knowing what others think about them.

How Narcissism Differs From Self-Confidence

It’s important to have a healthy sense of self-confidence, but when does that cross over into narcissism? Self-confident individuals reasonably believe in their own capabilities but also recognize that others have value, too. Narcissists, on the other hand, tend to excessively admire themselves and look at others with disdain.

Learn More About Narcissistic Personality Disorder

If you think you might be a narcissist—or if you have a loved one with narcissistic personality disorder—contact us today. We specialize in treating patients with narcissism, and we’d love the opportunity to help you overcome any struggles you might currently be experiencing.

The Link Between Social Media & Infidelity

Social media offers a number of benefits. It can help us feel more connected to our loved ones, introduce us to like-minded individuals who have similar interests, keep us updated on news and current events, and inspire us to try new things, just to name a few.

Unfortunately, social media can also make it easier for people to cheat on their significant others. Here are just a few reasons why:

Social media has made it easier than ever for people to meet each other and discreetly exchange messages and pictures.
Many people use social media to look up their exes, which can lead to them wanting to rekindle the relationship.
Social media allows people to reinvent themselves online in a way that they couldn’t do in person.
Some individuals don’t consider online affairs to be cheating in the same way as physical affairs (even if their partners disagree), making them more likely to engage in infidelity.

Notably, even when someone isn’t actually cheating, social media can cause their partner to feel jealous or suspicious and motivate them to start snooping around. This can lead to feelings of mistrust, betrayal, and resentment, which can negatively impact the relationship.

Experienced Therapists Specializing in Infidelity

Are you looking for a therapist who can help you move on from infidelity? The therapists on our team have extensive experience working with individuals who have cheated or been cheated on, and that background has provided us with unique insight into the connection between social media and infidelity. Contact us today to schedule your first therapy session.

What Is the 333 Rule for Anxiety?

If you regularly experience anxiety, you may have researched ways to relieve your symptoms and come across a coping mechanism known as the “333 rule.” But how does it work? The next time you’re feeling anxious, try:

Naming three things you see
Naming three sounds you hear
Moving three body parts

How Does the 333 Rule Reduce Anxiety?

Although the 333 rule doesn’t work in every situation, many therapists recommend it to patients living with anxiety because it helps to ground them. By concentrating on sights, sounds, and movements, patients can stop fixating on their worries and instead focus on the present moment. One of the benefits of the 333 rule is that it doesn’t require someone to be in a certain place or have access to a certain object—instead, they can use it virtually anytime and from almost anywhere. Patients can even practice the 333 rule when they’re not feeling anxious to start establishing it as a habit.

For More Information

If you’d like to know more about how the 333 rule can help combat anxiety, contact us today. Our therapists have experience using the 333 rule and various other techniques to treat anxiety, and we can develop a care approach that’s customized to your specific needs. When you reach out, we’ll tell you more about our practice, answer your questions, and arrange a time for you to attend an initial therapy session. We look forward to meeting with you and helping you take the next step toward an anxiety-free life.

Can a Narcissist Be Cured?

Narcissistic personality disorder—a mental health condition characterized by an excessive need to feel important and impress others—often causes narcissists to have an inflated sense of self-worth, lack empathy, and fantasize about possessing success, power, intelligence, and beauty. Narcissism differs from self-confidence in that it causes narcissists to view others with disdain rather than recognizing that they also have value.

Unfortunately, there’s currently no cure for narcissistic personality disorder, but certain treatments can help manage symptoms. These include:

Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) – This form of psychotherapy focuses on identifying and addressing unhelpful thoughts and behaviors.
Dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT) – DBT is a derivative of CBT that focuses on experiencing, accepting, and coping with emotions.
Metacognitive therapy (MCT) – This approach to psychotherapy focuses on controlling thinking processes (e.g., rumination) rather than on the content of thoughts.

While there’s currently no medication available to treat narcissistic personality disorder, certain medications can be used to treat related conditions, including anxiety and depression. When a narcissist seeks treatment, their provider will develop a customized care approach that’s specially designed to serve their individual needs.

Learn More About Narcissism

If you think that a friend, family member, or coworker is a narcissist—or if you’re concerned that you might be a narcissist yourself—we can help. Our team is highly experienced in treating narcissism, and we’ll be happy to speak with you about this condition. Contact us today to schedule a therapy appointment at the date and time of your choosing.

What Are the 5 Stages of PTSD?

You’ve likely heard of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), a mental health condition that can cause someone to experience anxiety, flashbacks, nightmares, and other symptoms after living through a traumatic event. But did you know that the mental health community commonly divides PTSD into five stages? They are:

Impact – This stage occurs immediately after someone experiences a traumatic event. The person may feel shocked, overwhelmed, powerless, guilty, anxious, or afraid.
Denial – Because the brain naturally blocks out traumatic experiences to protect itself, some people may go through a stage where they deny that the traumatic event occurred in the first place.
Rescue – During the rescue stage, someone begins coming to terms with the traumatic event, possibly returning to the site where it occurred or ruminating about what happened. Many people experience confusion, despair, hopelessness, and anger during this phase.
Acceptance – Once someone regains their sense of safety and begins to look at the traumatic event in a new light, they may recognize the impact that the experience had on their life and accept that they need help to move on from what happened. Anxiety and insomnia are common at this stage.
Recovery – During this final stage, someone takes affirmative steps (such as seeking professional help) to heal from their traumatic experience and implement coping mechanisms.

Your Top Choice for PTSD Treatment

No matter what stage of PTSD you’re in right now, we can help. Our therapists regularly work with individuals who are living with PTSD, and we understand that each patient requires a unique approach to care. After learning about your background and how PTSD affects you, we’ll work with you to overcome your symptoms and achieve an improved quality of life. Contact us today to learn more about our practice and schedule your first therapy session.

Cultivating Mindfulness in Daily Life

Have you heard about the concept of mindfulness? It involves being aware of the thoughts, feelings, and physical sensations that you’re experiencing at any given time (this is commonly referred to as “present moment awareness”). Practicing mindfulness offers numerous benefits, including:

Reduced stress, anxiety, and depression
Increased sense of well-being
Enhanced cognitive abilities
Slowed brain aging
Lowered blood pressure
Improved sleep
Pain management
Improved quality of life for individuals with chronic conditions

Practicing Mindfulness Every Day

Many people meditate by focusing on their breath—pay attention to how it feels as you inhale and exhale, and whenever you notice that your mind has wandered, acknowledge the distraction as a passing thought and then refocus your attention on your breathing. When you first begin practicing mindfulness, you may be able to do this for only a few minutes, but your sessions will likely get longer over time.

You can incorporate mindfulness techniques into your daily life by practicing present moment awareness when you’re:

Eating a meal
Taking a walk
Commuting to and from work
Coloring
Gardening
Showering
Lying in bed

If you’re having trouble, you may want to consider downloading an app that will guide you through the meditation process. Or, set some alarms on your phone that will remind you to meditate at certain times throughout the day.

Start Practicing Mindfulness

If you’d like to know more about mindfulness techniques and the benefits of present-moment awareness, contact us today. We’ll be happy to schedule a therapy session at a date and time that works for you.

Understanding Panic Disorder

If you’ve had at least four panic attacks and you regularly worry that you’ll experience another one, you may have panic disorder. In some cases, this type of anxiety can make it difficult for people to leave their home, since they may worry about when and where their next panic attack will occur.

What Does a Panic Attack Feel Like?

Panic attacks cause someone to feel an overwhelming sense of fear. During one of these attacks, you may experience:

Trembling and shaking
Numbness
Hot flashes or chills
Sweating
Lightheadedness and dizziness
A pounding heartbeat
Chest pain
Shortness of breath
A choking sensation
Nausea and stomach pain
Fear of losing control, going crazy, or dying
A sensation of being disconnected or unreal

While some panic attacks subside within just a few minutes, others last for more than an hour. Depending on the frequency, duration, and severity of panic attacks, panic disorder can sometimes become disabling, preventing someone from holding a job and engaging in other regular activities.

How Is Panic Disorder Treated?

Treatment for panic disorder varies from one person to another, and a trained provider can recommend the approach that’s most appropriate for your specific needs. With that said, panic disorder treatment often involves:

Taking medication (e.g., anti-anxiety medication or antidepressant medication)
Attending counseling
Learning coping skills and relaxation techniques

Offering Help With Anxiety Disorders

Our team has extensive experience treating various types of anxiety, including panic disorder, so if you need assistance, contact us today. We’ll be glad to schedule a therapy session at a date and time of your choosing. We look forward to helping you take the first step toward managing your anxiety.

Understanding CBT: What It Is & How It Works

Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is a type of talk therapy that focuses on identifying inaccurate or negative thinking, viewing difficult situations more clearly, and responding to those situations more effectively. CBT can be administered on an individual basis or in a group setting, and in some cases, it may be combined with another form of treatment (for example, medication). When compared to many other types of therapy, CBT often requires fewer sessions.

What Can CBT Be Used to Treat?

CBT has been shown to be effective in treating a wide range of mental health conditions, including:

Anxiety
Bipolar disorder
Depression
Eating disorders
Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD)
Phobias
Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
Schizophrenia
Sleep disorders
Substance use disorders

With that said, CBT isn’t just useful for individuals with mental illnesses—it can benefit anyone who’s dealing with a stressful situation. For example, CBT can also be used to help people cope with loss, resolve conflicts, and improve their communication skills.

Does CBT Sound Like the Right Choice for You?

If you think you could benefit from cognitive behavioral therapy, contact us today. Our friendly team can tell you more about our practice and how we incorporate CBT into our therapy sessions. And if we seem like a good fit for your needs, we can schedule a therapy appointment at a date and time that fits into your schedule. We look forward to speaking with you and helping you work toward your treatment goals.